Our Drives for External Security or External Freedom

A thought came to my mind today after doing a few readings for others, some personal introspection, and thinking back to some books I’ve read lately.


I’ve done a few readings for women who were basically in a place of “I want security in my life. I want a secure job and relationship.  Why can’t I have that?  When will I have that?”  What I always find interesting when I bring this kind of question to the cards, I often get a card (but not only limited to this one card) like the “4 of Pentacles”, which would mean that this person is wanting security so much in their external environment that they are insecure in their internal environment.


This brings up a good lesson is that: What is going on internally is therefore what we strive for externally.  In other words, what we perceive is what we believe on the inside.  Is a higher income job really going to make you feel more secure?  Is a marriage really going to make you feel more secure?  If you’re not secure within yourself now, then your chances are that it isn’t going to satisfy anything.  In fact, it may eventually just cause you to feel stagnant and wish for greater freedom, which brings me to the other end of the spectrum:  A drive to be a “free spirit” and not wanting any things to “tie you down”.  What can be concluded by a person who always wants freedom in their external environment with no ties of security to anyone or anything?  More than likely it is because this person does not feel free internally.  It’s likely that this person’s own conscious blocks from childhood are still causing them, to some extent, to still not fully express their higher self.


So what is the answer to all of this if we are not ultimately happy and complete with their security or freedom?  In a way, it’s almost like the yin-yang concept where if we thought of security as the yin and freedom as the yang.  We want both with different things and at different moments of our lives but if we don’t balance the two then we stay on a cycle of missing something.


So how do we live without “missing” something?  The only way to truly live without missing something is to be enough in touch with our own souls (or “higher selves” or “intuition” or “psyche” — whichever you like to call it) that we don’t repress our own unconscious drives.  The second we repress those drives (typically as a result of our own societal beliefs, family origins, fears, etc.) then we hurt ourselves and don’t feel “free” and “secure”.


You’re probably thinking: Yes, that could be easy maybe if I didn’t have to deal with social structures and expectations.  Yet, I suppose you can keep this thought in mind as well: What really is our reality:  Is it our dreams or is our waking life truly the “dream”?  Our sleeping dream is our inner truth, our waking life is our opportunity to overcome it and create everything that our heart’s desire.


About Jennifer Twardowski

Jennifer is a graduate student in transpersonal counseling psychology. Her interests are in personality typology (MBTI, Enneagram, Jungian typology), expressive arts, dreams, yoga, tarot and oracle cards, world religions, dance, photography, gardening, floral design, and more!

Posted on June 16, 2012, in Happiness. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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